I'm writing to you from the only piece of furniture left in the living room while watching Lilo and Stitch with Kayla. It's raining and pretty chilly out. She is trying to learn how to drink out of a straw and is being the sweetest thing. I get the pleasure of watching her while her Daddy {Eddie} and Papa are replacing my car top.
I believe the thing I'm struggling the most with is leaving the Kayla and Crash {Landon}. I have always adored the "grandkids" {my nieces and nephews} but this is the first set that I was of age to have my own. This is the first set that were born when my biological clock was ticking- correction- Kayla started my biological clock.
Before Kayla was born and after The Picture People, I was all done with kids. I didn't want any. Well then when Beth and Eddie got pregnant I was so excited to have a baby around since I live so far from the kids in Erie.
When Kayla was born and I held her in my arms that darn clock started ticking ever so lightly, but it did start. As I watched her grow and spent lots of time with her, babysitting her, playing dress up, taking a million pictures of her my heart warmed up to the thought of having a family and I began planning.
That's right, I changed. My whole world changed. Megan became a planner and maternal and wanted a family and was okay with the thought of marriage. I settled down, wanted a home of my own. Kayla helped me grow up. Then Beth and Eddie announced they were having a little boy...
Crash {Landon} was a different experience for me than Kayla. Kayla helped me to grow up and Crash showed me the responsibility behind having a family. He is the sweetest little guy and I got to experience having a baby around while in a serious relationship. Being able to share that experience with Boy was so special. Now, Crash is very close to me. He's my little guy! All smiles.
Beth calls me 2nd Mommy and I do feel that way with the kids. They mean the world to me. Ive been there for everything.
Leaving them will be the hardest part of this move. Every time I think about it the flood gates open and I'm a wreck. I'm going to miss them so much. I hope they come visit the most and we will be coming back to see them and the rest of the family. I don't want to miss everything with them like I did the rest of the kids.
Kayla and Crash are a few of my favorite things.
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