Thursday, October 15, 2009

I'm leaving in a mustang, don't know when I'll be back again


I'm taking a little break from cleaning and finishing touches. It's quiet and I'm left to my thoughts.

Tonight we had a going away dinner. Beth made a delicious meal, the kids were just perfect, and Eddie and I played some Wii. Dad was a little bit of everywhere. It was nice. I wondered why we didn't have a dinner like that once a week. Why it took one of us leaving to break bread with one another, family style. It was perfect and I only cried a little and in front of only one person, Crash {Landon}.

When I picked him up from Eddie and Beth and put him in my car and started to talk to him I realized that we weren't going to have our regular chats about him being such a handsome and happy baby. That I was going to have to make a real effort and so were they. It hurt. But there is always a sacrifice for things that you really want in life.

I changed Kayla one last time, man was it a horrible diaper too, and she just looked at me like she knew. Kayla is so wise, maybe she didn't know at all but I like to believe she did. And Eddie kept telling Kayla to say goodbye to Auntie because you wont see her for a while and by how often Eddie said it I knew that he felt it too. Leaving Eddie is never easy for me. He was my very first best friend and he means the world to me and now his wife is one of my best friends, who I can tell ANYTHING to and never judges me or is disappointed in me and I love her for that.

And then theres Dad. Anyone who knows me knows I'm a Daddy's Girl. My Dad and I are close and when he convinced me to move here I knew that I would be safe. Ive had more than my share of bouts with depression and Ive always run to Dad for them because I knew that he could take care of me when I couldn't take care of myself. He is truly my protector. Leaving him has always been scary.

So now you know what I am leaving behind. This is what I will be missing while living in the concrete jungle. I'm truly a blessed girl to have had 2.5 years here with them. And I cant wait till they come visit me and when i come back to visit them.

So now I take a break and wait for Boy and his parents to show up with their packed van. We'll unload it into the house and then say our goodbyes to them. I fear this will not be easy either. Its going to be a long couple of days for us. This is my calm before the storm.

Well, in much much brighter news, Mom, who has been my biggest cheerleader in this move and just moved herself, just had a big interview! She will find out sometime this week what the verdict is... I know she rocked it. Cant wait to hear the good news.

Back to work. May not be on for a while. Please pray for us.

XoXo,
M

1 comment:

  1. prayers are sent up :) I LOVE YOU AND I AM SO VERY PROUD OF YOU!! <33333

    ReplyDelete